Snarky Bitch continues taking on the State Park patrons

   There are 3 basic questions I asked every weekend this summer. They are, loosely in order:
1) How many people in the vehicle?
2) Is anyone in the car a (state I live in) resident?
3) Any children in carseat or booster seats? (When the language barrier broke down, I'd revert to "Any children in safety seats?" and after that I pantomimed buckling a child's carseat!)

    You'd think the first one is mostly a no-brainer. I mean, people is pretty inclusive right? So when I ask for "total number of people", it's logical to include all children in the car right? Wrong! I had to remind people that "Kids are people too!", so often that my co-workers and I joked it should be printed on a button we wear on our uniform! It's almost comical how often after asking for "total people", then adding "including all children", the number almost doubled!
    Please, say it with me: KIDS ARE PEOPLE TOO!

   The second question led to a lot of "lost my wallet" responses, when I asked for (state I live in) drivers license or other state-issued photo identification! Also, there are a lot of drivers driving without a license on them. Gods I wish just once there was a cop around when these total fuckfaces left the park!
   To be fair, there was more than one drunk driver snagged by park police! Always a good feeling. But it begs the question: How does one get drunk in a park that prohibits alcohol? (A sad point-of-fact: more than one person saw the "Alcohol Prohibited" sign and thought it was "Alcohol Permitted", and by thought I mean they had no idea that prohibited meant not allowed!)

   Finally, the third question. It's a simple question, are kids in a carseat or a booster seat?  It's a simple "yes" or "no" question. If "yes" I need a number. Not too difficult. And yet every weekend I have to count heads and remind parents that the question refers to safety seats, not carseats.
   I also reminded parents to buckle their children up. (Although the most awesome and sadly unrecorded GIF of the season went to a co-worker who did a "click, click" dance for one particularly ignorant father!)

   And before I leave, let me ask you this, which is a hotly debated question:
Is it a stereotype if it's been statistically proven to be true??

Snarky Bitch vs a Summer at a State Park (as an employee) part one???

   Snarky Bitch here! Have you missed me? I've missed you. I've been wearing my big girl panties every day and going to a real job! At which I work with "kids" (college-aged kids) and spend every day as a total tool. Or at least that's how the people who come into the state park I work at view me.

    Let's start with the biggest issue I found during the course of my time at the park: Carseats!
You'd think this would be a non-issue in 2014. I mean the laws are pretty cut-and-dry, but that did not stop people from ignoring them and then bitching/screaming/cussing/threaten us every time they had to pay for children not in a carseat or booster seat under the age of 8.
Here's just a few of the excuses I heard...
* "They don't all fit"- this usually came from families packing 6-9 people in a Honda Accord, or a similarly sized car.
* "He/She's too big for one"- the child in question usually is still in diapers and seated on someones lap.
* "It's my right as a parent to decide if my child needs a carseat or not, and I say they don't. You can't tell me how to parent!"- this father argued the philosophical nature behind our rules and pricing. He ultimately paid....for all of his kids not in carseats!
* "No, that's a baby. He/She no need a carseat"- yes, infants on adults laps were viewed as safer than a carseat!
* "But the baby is in a carseat!"- this came from a woman who was holding an infant carseat in her lap in the front seat. NOT okay and NOT legal!
* "But she/he was crying in line, so we took him/her out because the crying is horrible!"- yes, a crying baby is an awful sound. But you know what's a worse sound? A dead baby!
* "I had to feed the baby"- this was somehow turned into me being against breastfeeding, as every time I heard this it was because a child was being breastfed.

I was asked on more than one occasion if I was, in fact, a parent and if I knew what it was like to try to keep a child in a carseat. This was usually from parents with more than one child STANDING in the vehicle while it was moving and then they ASK the child if they'd please sit back down! Hell yeah, I'm a mother and HELL NO does my kid walk around in a moving car! On top of that I don't ask my kid to sit his ass back down, because he knows better than to EVER get up in the first place!
Is what I wanted to say. What I did respond with was "Yes, I am a mother. And my child was never out of a carseat while the car was moving, so it's never been an issue in my family."


   The second largest pain in my ass groups might have been: Senior Citizens!
You'd think, when you're closer to dying every morning than not, you might be a kinder person. You'd be wrong. Seniors were brutal!
   *They feel entitled to freebies. And bitch when they don't get one just for being old.
   *They are scheming thieves! Our senior pass is only good for the senior on the pass. That being said we did have a courtesy pass for seniors, that entitled them to free entrance into the park when the Entrance Lane was busy or closed. It's still only for the cardholder, but they started bringing their whole family in, trying to justify it as "You gave us the card to get in, so we're going in". Not okay! Old people did not like me!


   There were more incidents. I have a summer worth of issues to address. One of the more recent issues involved a senior, who did not have his pass but showed me a pass from another park. When I explained he'd have to pay, he got annoyed. I finally directed him to headquarters, as they are able to look up all senior passes issued at our park. He did so, and I was instructed to let him in no charge.
   Upon his return he tells me "You know, it's not about the money I can afford to pay. It's about the principle" *cue my blank stare* He went on "It's about the principle". I replied, quietly, "Sir, I'm only doing my job.". His reply? "It was all about the principle" and drove away.
    I still don't know what this "principle" is that he was blathering on about!

Snarky Bitch takes on.....stupid dog owner

    As I mentioned before, I'm working again. As a result I deal with stupid people a lot more often than I previously have. Today I dealt with a stupid pet owner. Dog, to be specific.

Potential Park Visitor (PPV): How much is it?
*I immediately notice the small dog jumping in the backseat*
me: I'm sorry ma'am, but we're pet free at this point in time. I can't allow into the park with your dog.
*Normal people would just accept that answer and ask if they can turn around*
PPV: Well, what if I don't let him leave the car?
me: I'm sorry, what?!? (because I've clearly misunderstood what she just said, right?!)
PPV: What if I keep him in the car? Can I come in then?
me: No ma'am. It's very hot outside, your dog would not survive being locked in the car while you go to the beach. If I let you in and you left your dog in the car I'd have to call DNR officers and you may be faced with animal cruelty charges.
PPV: Are you serious?!
me: Yes ma'am, your dog's safety is important and that's why we don't allow pets in the park during peak months.
PPV: *to her friend* You believe this?! It's a DOG!
me: Ma'am I need you to exit the park off to the left there, there's a line forming and I will not be letting into the park today with your dog in that vehicle.

And I'd like to state, for the record, I was very nice and used a soothing but firm tone while talking to this lady. Her dog was a small dog, a little bigger than my cats.